the tale of two boots…

Buckle in my friends…it’s Monday…and so far it’s been a real keeper…

home and happy…

Busy morning here with Miss Courtney. We had a big neurology appointment at 8:30 a.m. in downtown DC. Oh yes my friends, I am that mother who is insane enough to schedule a major appointment first thing in the a.m. on a Monday during rush hour. 


sadistic is my middle name…


So we were up at 5:30 a.m. to get everyone ready to go and made it out the door by 6:45 a.m. It was pouring down rain and I had Miss Court in layers, her rain cape was on and boots. 


“Big Bertha” did her job admirably and I was feeling confident that we would arrive at the Neurologists new office location with time to spare. I had called ahead last week to check and make sure there was sufficient parking for a wheelchair van and was assured by the pleasant office assistant that indeed there was. 


As I approached the new building, barely able to see through the rain, I noticed it was located on a one way street which only allowed you to turn if you were coming from the opposite direction. 


Awesome. 


So two blocks and one u-turn later, I turned onto the street ready to find that fabulously wonderful parking I was assured would be there. 


Liar, liar, pants on fire…


Needless to say there was NO street parking and the only place I found was the McDonald’s down the street. I was now five minutes late and had a two block walk ahead of me…in the rain no less. 


Yippee skippee. 


I unloaded Miss C, made sure her boots were on tight, rain cape adjusted and off we went as fast as my stubby legs would take us. 


As we turned the corner to get to the main entrance of the building, I saw something fly up and over the chair. It was black. I thought it was a bird flying by. But no. It was Miss Courtney’s right boot that she had flung off with great abandon.  


It landed right in the middle lane of Wisconsin Ave. 


Oh.yes.indeed.it.did. 


Miss Courtney was swinging her legs happily laughing her little bum off as a Metro bus ran over her boot. Then a car and another car and another car, and…and…and…


Son.of.a.Sea.Biscuit.


WhatdoIdo?WhatdoIdo?WhatdoIdo? 


Taking my life into my hands, I ran between several stopped vehicles (thank you red light) and retrieved my daughters boot, all while every colorful metaphor I knew was streaming from my mouth. 


By the time I made it back to Miss Courtney’s parked wheelchair, my shoes were soaked and the bottom of my jeans as well. My daughter was still laughing that honking goose laugh of hers. I may or may not have expressed my distress to my second born child at that moment. 


Finally we made it into the Doctor’s office fifteen minutes behind schedule. Upon arriving on the fourth floor, I expressed my displeasure over the parking situation with as much pleasantness as I could muster, holding a muddy boot and pushing a wheelchair dripping with water holding one very happy young lady. 


We were quite a sight I must say. 

She was exhausted from the tossing of the boot…

We also discussed the possibility of her undergoing a partial hysterectomy. I know that this sounds rather radical but in Courtney’s world it’s actually quite common. You can imagine how challenging it can be to care for someone who is still menstruating and wearing adult diapers. She has very sensitive skin as well as the fact that she is anemic and really struggles with her monthly visitor. This time of the month takes a lot out of her and this is the fourth physician to suggest this to us.  


Because of her disability, there are no religious consequences to this decision it’s just a matter of deciding what we think is best for her. As Courtney gets older, things have become more challenging so Jerry and I will really need to pray about this and seek some direction. It’s not an easy thing to discuss but it is something we must consider. 


After all of that, I bundled Court up and we headed back out into the rain again. I made sure BOTH boots were on snug, instructing my daughter that her life was on the line if she repeated her boot ditching trick again. 


We headed back to the van and as we were crossing the street, I “ran over” a bump in the road but just kept going. As I was loading Miss Courtney into the van, I noticed her left boot was missing. 

bootless and happy about it…

Are.you.freaking.kidding.me?


I looked back and saw a black lump by the side of the road dangerously close to floating into a sewer drain. Sweet mother of gravy I was about ready to kill this kid. Here she was just smiling away, teeth and all, and I was madder than a wet hen.


Hell, I was a wet hen. 


I got Courtney into the van and stomped back across the street to retrieve the boot. I tossed the muddy wet clump into the front seat and took about four deeeeeepppp breaths before I started the van and headed home.   


How I love Mondays! 


We have arrived safely, boots are off and Court is snuggled in. I am now self-medicating with a grilled cheese sandwich and a piece of fudge or maybe twenty. 


There is seriously NOT enough coffee in this house to face another morning like this.