I had so many plans…and then…

Last night I spoke publicly for the first time about the last three months of Courtney’s life. It was a tough thing, but I survived it and I think that it may have actually helped some other parents facing a similar future. There were tears and laughter and maybe even a moment where snot was dripping down my nose and I had to have an emergency Kleenex intervention. 


There may have been a moment where I was speaking about how I lost the desire to even make dinner during those last three months, thereby asking the question “Who needs dinner anyway?”. My husband may, or may not, have raised his hand at that moment saying, “But I like dinner” causing a chuckle or twelve thousand. That man and his stomach. Oy Vey! 


I can neither confirm nor deny that this took place. You had to be there.  


I know that there will be many more opportunities to speak about Miss Courtney and her life but I am just so happy to have gotten through the first one in one piece. 


I know I promised to have a What I Wore post as well and a {pretty, happy, funny, real} post but I am just plain wore out. it has been a big week for me and my brain, she is very, very tired. We have a big weekend ahead of us. Memorial Day is special this year, as Miss Courtney’s grave will be blessed on Monday. 


There is still much to do inside our home to make our way through all the clutter that has accumulated over the the last six months. Depression and grief are not pretty when they create a unhealthy physical and emotional environment that must be addressed. 


We will be clearing our minds, hearts and living room over the next few days. There might be a few others things planned as well, but you will have keep track on my gram feed to see what’s happenin. 


I will see y’all next week here in this space. For now, stay safe and be kind to one another. On this Memorial Day weekend, remember those who have given their lives in service to this great country of ours. May God Bless them and those they left behind. 


God is GOOD all the time. 


#lovealwayswins