week in my life ~ 2014…tuesday…
He was happy to just snuggle up with Miss Courtney and hang out for the day. I was happy to get out in the beautiful sunshine, have my first red cup of the season, a skinny peppermint mocha, and go, go, go. It was a win, win for both of us. A nice day indeed.
The other big change was I got my hair cut. I am a little unsure about it but I was desperate for a change and well, it’s definitely shorter in the back but I still have the angle cut in the front. I don’t know. I don’t think it’s enough change. I think I may just go really short for awhile. Maybe a pixie? I just feel so old and tired in the hair department.Thoughts?
Of course there was also snuggling with Miss Courtney. She had a really rough afternoon suffering through several very hard grand mal siezures. They come out of the blue these days and boy do they wipe my sweet girl out. To hold her through them and comfort her after them is such a privilege for me. I just whisper prayers over her and hope for all of it to stop.
At times, especially when she stops breathing for those 10-15 seconds, I will even beg God to just make it all stop, to end her suffering and bring her home to Him.
I know, what mother does that?! This mother who is tired of watching her daughter fight so damn hard to breathe. It just hurts more some days than others. This afternoon was one of those times. I just keep reminding myself that God is in control of this train and my girl still has work to do.
until tomorrow,
Love these posts, all the time.
Praying for God's Mercy and Peace be yours….
Prayers and so much love! What an amazing mom and wife you are!!
An amazing mother does that, Mary. Truly. Courtney is so blessed by you, as are we! Prayers for you both and thank you, Jerry for your service! Oh that red cup…….
You guys continue to be in my prayers!!!!
Yeah!!!! for Mama time! I love your hair, but say, go for the pixie! It's so much fun for a big change, and I LOVE pixies.
Speaking as a Mama who has a princess in heaven…you are not alone. When my Miss Miriam was having seizures and on a breathing tube and they told me she would not make it, I prayed and said to let her go right away, I did not want to see her suffer. My Mama heart wanted her here, but a Mama's heart also never wants their babies to suffer, and knowing she was going straight into the arms of God, was far more comforting. Don't feel guilt for those feelings. You and Courtney and all of your family are forever in our prayers. Your names are life family in our daily routine. Much love and prayers.
Sharon
Courtney looks beautiful as ever.
I have been reading your blog for a little while and you all have been in my prayers! What a treat to get out and enjoy some time to yourself. I love your haircut, I have a soft stack about the same length – so easy to take care. May God be with Courtney and all of you.
An amazing, faith-filled mother asks our Heavenly Mary to watch over our children and care for them, even if that means bringing them to heaven with Her so they can be free of this earthly suffering. I watched a dear friend this year as she loved her baby girl from her arms into the arms of Our Mother. She prayed at the end for Mary to take her little girl because she suffered from cancer so much at the end. Mary heard the prayer and took her just as they finished a decade of the rosary. I have been following your journey. I have a 9-year old daughter with special needs who has endured so much in her short 9 years. Your strength and faith are an inspiration to me (whether you feel like you are or not). God bless you and Miss Courtney and I pray for you daily.