project blessing…reclaiming the joy of Courtney’s birthday…
This morning everything was going along just fine and then I checked my email. I opened it up and WHAMMO…
It felt like I got sucker punched in the gut. I wasn’t prepared. I was just reading my email and there it was. Two weeks from now it would have been Courtney’s 23rd birthday. Remember last year? Remember the stress happening all around us as we prepared for the big day? Remember the celebration filled with so much joy and love? Remember all the love that came through the mail, the pictures, cards, decorations?Â
I knew deep in my heart that we needed to celebrate. I knew that things were changing at that time and so I reached out to you beautiful people and you just blew us away with your love, prayers and good wishes. The day finally arrived and it was the most beautiful day. God outdid himself that day. He truly did.
Courtney has taught our family to SEE the world and God in a most wonderful way. There were so many days of quite desperation, where I would cry out to the Lord to make it all end, to bring her home. He did. In His time.Â
The lessons and love she has left behind for us are still being revealed as we can handle them. We always chose love with our girl. No matter what situation we were facing. The more we loved, the easier the hard stuff got to bear.Â
As my day went on, Courtney sent people to love me where I was. Melanie came with flowers and facebook lit up with messages of hope, laughter and so much love. My nieces arrived from southern Virginia for a 48 hour visit and I walked away from the sadness and stayed present in the moment.Â
As I was chatting with my nieces an idea was born. Why not celebrate her birthday as we did last year??Â
Por que you say? What do you mean, Mary?Â
I mean let’s celebrate Courtney’s legacy of love. Here’s what I need YOU ( I mean ALL of you, no matter age or sex, reading this) to do.Â
I need you to answer this question…How has Courtney affected you? How has her story impacted your life? How has her intercession helped you or family?Â
As Jerry and I prepare for her birthday in two weeks, it would be such a gift to us to know how our sweet girl has spoken to you. I have decided to make a scrapbook of sorts. I have one of photos that my freind Janet (Hi Janet) gave me that I am writing the stories too.Â
I would love to have a book of testimonies and shared stories of how our girl changed hearts, impacted lives, made you smile or laugh or even cry or pray for the very first time (true. I have the email).
You can send it snail mail in a note or card ( I heart snail mail so much). You can email me at mary_romance@cox.net to get our address. Just put “project blessing” in the memo line.Â
You can have your kids draw what they think Courtney looks like in heaven or whatever their little hearts wish to. You can leave it in a comment here on the blog.You can also send it in an email (address above).I can print it out and put it in the book.Â
Whatever you choose to do, however you choose to do it is fine. Let’s celebrate Courtney’s legacy of faith, love and hope.Â
What say you fine readers? You in?Â
Let “Project Blessing – Reclaiming the Joy of Courtney’s Birthday” begin. Please feel free to share this post with whomever you feel like. The more the merrier.Â
I love you sweet Courtney and I miss you every single day. I promise to stay in the light of God’s love and away from the dark tunnels of doubt and depression. You deserve that and so much more.Â
Bring it on internet…Ready…set…go…
Mary
Mary, After having been traveling for the holidays, I saw the news that Courtney had died within an hour or so of finding out I was pregnant with our fifth child (waiting to get home from the travels to take the test and to get online). It was a whole afternoon of tears, of excitement and joy and fear for our new child's life and great grief over the loss of your child. But I prayed for you and thought of Courtney often in the following weeks, as I laid on the couch so sick and worried about the future. Your story always reassured me that everything would be okay. Even in the "worst case scenario" of losing a child, you had gained a saint and not lost your faith. Now I just realized that there's a chance–slim b/c I'm often overdue–that this baby girl could be born on Courtney's birthday. I would love that. We've been discussing Elizabeth as a middle name, and if I can get my husband on board, it will be in tribute to St. Elizabeth of Hungary and (St.) Courtney Elizabeth. Whatever the case, I will always hold a special association between your Courtney and this baby currently squirming in my womb. God bless you all!
Oh KC…thank you. Thank you so much for writing this down. I am humbled that our girl could help you in such a profound way. Know that she will be with you through labor and delivery as well, no matter what day your sweet little one decides to come. Hugs!